Description
I. The Conflicting Sides of Conflict 1. Three Sides to Every Story 2. ""You're Wrong!"": Relationship Problems as Faults II. A DEEP Understanding of Conflict: The Third Side of the Story 3. ""How Can You Be That Way?"": Relationship Problems as Differences 4. ""You Know How to Hurt Me"": Relationship Problems as Emotional Sensitivities 5. ""Can't You See I'm Stressed Out?"": Relationship Problems as External Circumstances 6. A Cure Worse Than the Disease: Relationship Problems as Patterns of Communication III. From Argument to Acceptance 7. The Delicate Balance: Acceptance and Change 8. A Story of Our Own: Acceptance through Understanding 9. Walking in Your Partner's Shoes: Acceptance through Compassion 10. Getting Some Perspective on the Conflict: Acceptance through Tolerant Distance IV. Deliberate Change through Acceptance 11. The Dilemmas of Deliberate Change 12. Deliberate Change through Mindfulness: Custom-Fitting Change to Suit Your Relationship 13. Deliberate Change through Communication: Taking Good Advice about Talking and Listening with a Mindful Grain of Salt 14. The Silver Bullet of Deliberate Change: Taking Charge of Change Even When Things Go Bad V. When Acceptance Is Not Enough 15. ""Don't Do That to Me!"": Violence, Verbal Abuse, and Infidelity 16. Calling In the Professionals: Couple and Individual Therapy Resources Bibliography